Marshall explains an exercise in Giraffe communication to the group. This is just the explanation of this exercise.
Participants are invited to express honestly to another person, what in their behaviour they do not like. The jackal puppet takes the place of the other person, the giraffe puppet takes the place of a communication coach. I like the playfullness, richness and flexibility that this constellation provides for the communication trainer.
Time Codes
- 00:00 Let’s learn some Giraffe
- 00:16 Exercise: How to educate somebody, whose behavior is not enriching our life in some way?
- 01:15 Think of somebody, who is not enriching your life – a child, an adult, at work, at home …
- 02:00 Imagine being honest to this person about the behaviour that bothers you. Write down word for word what you would say to them.
- 02:39 Pretend the jackal puppet is the person and say to them what you wrote down. The giraffe puppet will coach you
More from this workshop – see here.
Notes
Listening carefully to how Marshall presents this exercise, I note that he uses process/giraffe language most of the time in describing the exercise. Example: “whose behaviour is not enriching our life” or “is not in harmony with our values” – these sounds neutral non-jackal to me (even though a pro-jackal will hear judgments in anything). “Education” here is “Giraffe education” – also this is seen in the intention “to change their behaviou willingly, not from guilt, fear or shame”
It is noteworthy for me to say this, because when I remember my beginnings in Giraffe, I would not be able to see this subtelty, as the only language I spoke and was aware of was Jackal. So to see that “I like” and “I do not like” are Giraffe ways of expressing, which of course still can be heard in Jackal – but they are at least maximizing the chances of getting heard in Giraffe. Clearly it is not difficult to hear “I do not like” as “What is wrong with you?” 🙂
I like the humor of Marshall – “The jackal has no teeth!” Always puts a big smile on my face.
Note on Marshall’s use of Giraffe. I pay attention to how Marshall favors the use of verbs in describing situations – preference for dynamic forms over static forms. Very cool. And we can all learn this, but it takes practice and mindfulness. Nice to do it and to check in with if and how it feels different.