Possessivness

One major stumbling block in our lives is attachment. We get attached to things we love. This can be material possessions – a car, a house, other objects – and this can also include people, we love.

What does it mean – love – in this sense? We love situations, where many of our needs are fulfilled. It is easy to see, how this could be true for a house, for example. And also for our partners in life. They give so much to us. Sensual pleasures, for sure. Also spiritual well-being. We may feel our value based on the fact that another loves us and lives with us. We can be something with the person, but we are nothing without the person. This situation can create an insane amount of pain, based on confusion on who we think we are – and what it means to us when we think this is true – vs. who we are in reality – which is changing and evolving, as life moves through our material form.

Trennung - Verpasste Verbindung / Separation - Missed Connection
An impressive separation dialogue – German radio play

But we will lose our material posessions and we will lose our partner, our friends, our parents and even sometimes our childrens. Death is inevitable. This awareness can help us to appreciate deeper what we have in the moment and to let go of our attachments, or loosen the grip.

Empathy for possessivness

When you say you will never let go of me, is this a measure of just how happy you are with me?

When you say, you cannot imagine living without me, are you feeling fearful of a time, when I would not be at your side?

Two feelings – I gather – might be alive in possessivness. FEAR – which results in our attempt to control and to have power of the “object of our love”. HAPPINESS – about the fulfilled needs, that we experience in relation to this “object of love”

Obstacle to my empathy – my need for FREEDOM – I want my choice to be or not to be in a situation to be respected at all times.